*Photos are in order from our engagement photos to our TWO wedding celebrations! More to share on my style for all the different bridal events in another post!
Ya’ll might wonder why you should take advice from a newlywed (married for a year), but I can assure you that I do have some expertise in the matter, seeing as I planned TWO weddings for myself! I know, I’m basically a hero and deserve a Medal of Honor. Ha, just kidding! But, after planning these events, I’ve definitely learned a-LOT. Why did I plan two weddings? IT’s a long story, so I’ll give you the Campbell’s condensed version.
A couple of weeks after Josh proposed to me, my life changed. I was hospitalized for a failing gallbladder and severely swollen and inflamed liver that wasn’t functioning properly. Months and months of different doctors, different medicines, IV therapy, and never-ending doctors visits and tests, I was finally diagnosed with choleric, advanced Lyme disease and a few other complications that occurred from being undiagnosed and weakening my immune system. It’s been a long road to recovery, and I’m still not there. I’m still sick and dealing with my symptoms and a lack of understanding and appreciation in the medical community, but, I digress. So, I’ve been sick for about a year and a half. Much of it has had me bedridden. So, I wasn’t sure how I was ever going to plan the wedding that I wanted in the condition I was in. That’s when we decided to quicken the date of our wedding and have a private, intimate destination wedding. We still wanted to celebrate with friends and family that couldn’t attend, plus nonrefundable deposits had been made with our vendors. So, we kept our original wedding date on the books for our big reception with all of our loved ones. We even did a surprise ceremony for those who weren’t able to witness the original one! So, all of that to say that I know a little of what I’m talking about 😉 More to come on Lyme disease and health!
For now, here are my tips to help plan a stress-free wedding for those brides who have challenges like I did, or for those who just don’t need or want a big, stressful process to say “I do” to their partner. If you have any other tips, I’d LOVE to hear what helped you guys!
1. Consider a destination wedding! By being removed and having a coordinator wherever your destination is, it allows you to be literally removed from the process and a little more hands-off. That means, less time stressing about unimportant details (and let’s be honest, monogramed cocktail napkins and intricate details will most likely neither be remembered or noticed and appreciated by your guests), and more time focusing on the important stuff: your relationship and the real meaning of getting married!
2. Utilize a wedding planner or coordinator! If you have it in your budget, have someone (not someTHING like a website) help you plan out the details, work with vendors and keep you on track with your timeline. That way, you don’t get bogged down on small details and overwhelmed with the never-ending decor options. The engagement period should be enjoyed, not rushed and spent stressing or arguing over wedding details! Enjoy it, because it’s brief and the only time that you get to be a fiancé!
3. Create Pinterest boards! Pinterest is amazing at helping people find inspiration. It helps create a theme or an idea of what styles you want to showcase at your wedding. Create private Pinterest wedding boards, and share your vision with coordinator so that they have an exact idea of what you want. Pictures are the best way to describe your style and to keep everyone on the same page.
4. Make a wedding binder! Create an organized binder with a wedding checklist, budget spreadsheets, your receipts, payment details, and communications with vendors. That way, any discrepancies can easily be solved, and you feel organized and on top of things.
5. Recruit help when you need it! Don’t be afraid to ask your bridesmaids, friends, family, wedding industry professionals, or anyone for help. That’s what friends and family are for, and most of the time, they’re just waiting for you to say the word so that they can help. Host a wine night with your bridesmaids and have them help you with your invitations, or plan a fun event where you can get the help you need, but you also enjoy time with the friends or family who’s helping you!
6. Go to vendor expositions! Need inspiration? Still looking for vendors? Find everything you need at these kinds of events. Vendors provide you with samples, insight, tools, and inspiration all while you sip cocktails and nibble on hors d’oeuvres. The one that comes to mind for me was the Washingtonian Bride & Groom Unveiled. It’s like the Rolls Royce of wedding shows-picture a swanky hotel with servers offering wedding-themed cocktails, delicious food, bridal fashion shows, hair & makeup styling, etc. You name it, it’s there. If you can, snag a ticket and take your mom or friends to this-you won’t be disappointed!
7. Attend your potential wedding location’s events! Go to the location when there’s a wedding or local catering event, etc. to get a feel for what they can do with the space and how the vibe works with your vision. Make a list of your top 5 must haves in a space, and see if that location can accommodate. If they can, and the location’s space gives you the vibe you’re going for, then book the space! A lot of venues have bridal events where vendors come and you can taste their menus, see their floral capabilities, etc. These events can be so helpful to lock in vendors and ensure your vision is able to come to life.
8. Keep your partner involved! Most of the time, men just want their brides to be happy, so the saying “Whatever you want, dear” is as common to hear as white is for a wedding dress. However, you should still keep them in the loop; ask how they feel about certain elements of your vision to still make sure they feel like they have a say. Also, if you need help, your spouse is the perfect person to ask help from. It’s their wedding too, so they should absolutely be able to help. Communicate clearly and promptly what you need and when, and I’m sure they’ll be happy to help….they’ll probably do anything to ensure you don’t become bridezilla 😉
9. Talk to past brides! If you need inspiration, insight, help, or have questions, who better to answer than someone who has already done it? My eyes were opened to so many ideas, inspiration, and honesty when I asked my wedded friends questions. They tell you things that no magazine or vendor will typically be honest about-real talk!
10. Most importantly, stay true to YOU! Your wedding day is about you and your spouse-no one else. So, don’t break the bank over details that, if honestly asked, you don’t care about. Don’t do things because so-and-so did it and you need to keep up with the Joneses. I promise you, no one cares about the details; no one cares about what did or didn’t get done-only you. That day is fleeting and flies by faster than you can snap your fingers. So, whatever you do, do it for you. Do it because you want it that way, not because a wedding magazine says it’s a trending must-have. As long as your guests have access to booze, can dance to the classics, and don’t get food poisoning, consider your wedding a huge success!
There will always be a naysayer that would’ve done things differently, but that’s what makes us individuals-embrace your wedding’s uniqueness. So, Karen can just give it a rest and shove it up her own wedding’s a$$ if she doesn’t approve of your wedding style. Who cares about her opinion anyways? You have your Prince Charming, and happily ever after is right over your wedded horizon. Enjoy it, babes!!
Hopefully these tips spoke to you and help you in planning your special day. Again, if you have any thoughts or suggestions that I didn’t cover, send them my way! I’d love to hear what helped you! Otherwise, I’ll see you guys soon in my closet. Can’t wait!!
XO,
Sarah
